Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Original Cine

In Christianese, we have the phrase "original sin."  In my growing up, this was the sin of Lucifer, which I heard sermons on being "pride."  But now I believe that that's incorrect.  His original sin was to compare himself to God. ("I want to be as great...").

Using comparison words like "like" and "as" is a sure sign something's amiss.  That I'm walking in Ego or the Flesh.  This was brought home one time when I was driving to lunch with my mentor.

I was mildly depressed.  I had made one movie and was having trouble getting the second one going.  Robert Rodriguez hit big with his first movie.  Spielberg was 21 when he directed his first film. So I was lamenting to my mentor, who turned the table on me with a Yoda-esque question.  "What are you?  Gold, silver or bronze?"

I thought for a second.  I'm pretty good I thought.  Maybe not the best.  So I answered "Bronze," showing my mentor that I could be humble.  He curtly replied "then there's nothing I can do for you." And he shut up.  I felt like I had been body slammed to the ground.  I quickly said "okay, then I'm gold," not really believing it but realizing that was the answer he was looking for. Today, I still have to remind myself that I'm gold.

There's only one right answer here according to Psalm 139.  And to say anything less is to tell God He made a mistake.  Which is incredibly common.  I do it.  You do it.  "Sheesh God, you really messed up when you made me!"  Although He says in scripture that I'm fearfully and wonderfully made, but I'm telling God He's a liar.  I don't want to do that.  How could my mentor help me if I was calling God a liar?

It all comes down to Value.  What do I think I'm worth?  That was the question that my mentor asked as he saw me walking down the fatal path of comparison.  What am I worth?  This computer I'm typing on, what's it's value?  A couple grand?  Maybe new.  But what about now?  Could I get $100 for it?  If I could, then that's what it's value is.  I define "value" as what price someone is willing to pay.

For you adept in Christianese, you know where I'm going.  What's the price God's willing to pay for me?  His only Son?  And I turn to God and say "that's not enough!"  To say I'm anything but Gold may seem like humility, when in fact it's incredible arrogance.  To say I'm silver is to say Jesus's sacrifice was insufficient.

There's one answer.  God makes Gold, not Goof-ups.

No comments:

Post a Comment